Everybody Loves Raymond : A show I love

The show is titled Everybody Loves Raymond because Robert, Ray's brother, thinks that he is the favored one at home and in life. 

 

 

Everybody Loves Raymond is a show I keep returning to when I’m feeling down and need a good laugh.  The sitcom is an American comedy that ran from 1996 to 2005 and can currently be watched on Amazon Prime Video.

The show is centered around the dysfunctional Barone family. How the Barones take on life and one another provides for the comedy.   

 Ray Barone

  Sportswriter Ray Barone, who works for Newsday, lives with his long-suffering wife, Debra, daughter Ally, and twin sons, Michael and Geoffrey. His intrusive parents, Marie and Frank, along with his jealous brother, Robert, live across the street. Ray, a beleaguered and shy person, often finds himself delicately poised in the middle of a confrontation between his wife and mother or a family, sometimes having to make peace and sometimes having to take sides.

Debra Barone

Debra Barone claims to be overworked and stressed as she juggles housework and caring for 3 boisterous children, receiving little or no help from her husband, Raymond. Debra justifiably complains about her in-laws, who visit more than necessary. She frequently vents out her frustration on her husband, Ray by yelling and banging articles in the house. 

Marie Barone

The controlling, intrusive, and crafty Marie Barone takes pride in her housekeeping skills and her prowess in the kitchen, often trying to upstage Debra. She is given to meddling with Ray and Debra’s laundry, mail, and  food and passing disparaging remarks about Debra’s cooking and housekeeping skills. Whenever Ray visits her, she greets him with, “ Are you hungry, dear?” assuming that he’s eaten something tasteless at home. Ray never disappoints her as he sits down to savour her cooking.  Marie is always trying to find a match for Robert, in the hope that he settles down and gives her grandchildren.

Frank Barone

Frank is a retired bookkeeper who also served in the Korean War. Among other things, Frank doesn’t care for personal hygiene, pleasantries, or people. He lives and cares only for good food and sports. Frank is critical of his sons' inability to handle their personal lives. Marie and Frank are always at loggerheads. Unlike his sons, he is not intimidated by Marie and is open in his criticism of her. Though the couple maintain that he only married her for her cooking, deep down, he is shown to care for her.

Robert  Barone 

 Robert is Raymond’s older, quirky, divorced, over six feet tall, police officer brother. He is insanely jealous of Raymond’s successful career, the fact that Raymond is married and the father of 3 children, and, most importantly, that Raymond is favoured over him by their parents.  

His greatest quirk is touching his food to his chin before eating it. Robert is unlucky in love until he marries Amy. Raymond and Robert often bicker like overgrown children. Raymond, however, is the more sensitive, loving, and kind member of his family.

Amy MacDougall

Amy is Robert’s second wife and Debra’s best friend. Debra introduced her to Robert. Amy and Robert break up several times because Robert sees other women, and once, Raymond is blamed for their parting of ways. Amy has an obnoxious older brother called Peter who is intensely disliked by the Barone family.

Peter MacDougall

Robert doesn’t care for Peter, Amy's brother, but eventually, they find they have something in common: both were eclipsed by their younger siblings. They get on better after that.

 

Some memorable lines from the series:

 

“I tried 'nice' once, but didn’t care for it.” Frank to the family

 “It’s time to take out the trash.” Marie to Joanne, Robert’s first wife when she forces her to leave the house.

 

“How about we golf for it today?” “Loser gets Mom.” Robert to Raymond

 

“You are an idiot wrapped in a moron.”  Raymond to Robert

 

“You’d have to be a cook to understand.” Marie to Debra

 

 “Explain to me how you can’t fold a shirt. Explain to me how an adult human with thumbs is not able to do that.” Debra to Raymond

 

“What contest in hell did I win?” Frank to Marie when she calls herself a ‘trophy’ wife.

 

My other favorites, to name a few, are The Middle, M.A.S.H., Mom, The Jeffersons and  All in the Family. These are old serials and can be found on streaming platforms like Prime Video, Netflix, and YouTube. 

Name some of yours. 

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Dare to Dream: The Legend of Charles Chaplin

 

Every one of us has a dream or dreams that we are hoping to turn into reality. What does it take to make a dream come true?

Here, I pay tribute to none other than the legend Charlie Chaplin, who never let go of his dream even in the most punishing of circumstances.

Charles Spencer Chaplin was born on April 16^th, 1889, in London. His parents, Hannah Chaplin and Charles Chaplin Senior, were performers in the world of music and theater.

However, his alcoholic father abandoned the family when Charlie was still a very young boy. His mother was left to raise Charlie and his half-brother, Sydney, alone. The family lived in abject poverty as Charlie's mother continued to perform, struggling to feed her boys with the little money that she earned. Charlie sat in the audience, mesmerized by his mother’s performances, dreaming of the day when he would stand and perform before an audience.

Then one day, while performing, Hannah suddenly lost her voice—she could not sing. The audience jeered and booed her. Then something magical happened. Five-year-old Charlie stepped onto the stage, sang, and danced. The crowd loved it. Charlie was happy. He now knew that this was what he was born to do.

Life had other plans for Charlie. His mother grew mentally ill and was taken to a mental hospital. Charlie and his brother were left to fend for themselves. They were reduced to street urchins, fighting for survival. In spite of the odds, Charlie kept going. He never gave up on his dream.

Charlie’s life was now wretched. He and his brother were forced to find work in workhouses. The workhouses were cruel and cold places. Charlie was separated from his brother Sydney. His mother’s condition was worsening. Charlie watched helplessly.

His dream was still alive. He knew he had to fight for his dream. He began looking for jobs and delivered newspapers, washed dishes, and even made toys. All through he held on to his dream.

One day, Charlie saw a group of street performers doing their act. Charlie joined them, but nobody noticed him or paid any attention to him. Charlie did not give up. He continued to work on his act, watching other comedians and learning from them, and slowly he began to get noticed. He knew he had the power to make people happy.

At the age of 14, he was hired by a theater group called the Lancashire Lads. Though the part was small, Charlie worked hard, and soon a theatre director noticed his talent and gave him opportunities to shine. At 16, Charlie landed his first major acting role in a play called Sherlock Holmes.

Charlie was no longer a street performer. He was acting in real theaters before larger audiences. Directors noticed that there was something extraordinary about Charlie. He could evoke emotions in people without speaking a single word.

The best thing to happen to Charlie was when Hollywood came calling in 1910. This was a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity for Charlie. America was the place where dreams came true. He was invited by a famous comedy troupe called Fred Karno’s Company, which performed in America. He boarded the ship to his future.

Charlie knew for sure that in America, he could realize his dream of becoming a star. In 1913, a small company called Keystone Studios gave Charlie a small role in a silent movie. Even though it did not amount to much, Charlie grabbed the role. He wanted to create a character for his audience, something they wouldn’t forget, and so he created a character—a small man in a funny hat, wearing oversized clothes, a tight coat, a mustache, and a walk unique to him.

At first, people did not understand, but slowly Charlie’s character grew on them. Charlie made them laugh without speaking a single word. His movies were hits, and he began earning huge sums of money. The poor boy from London was now the most famous star in the world. By 1917, Charlie Chaplin was not just famous; he was a phenomenon. Charlie remained unfazed by the glitz, glamour, and fame. He was still the boy from London who had cried for his mother and lived through merciless times, but never gave up his dream. He was now the most famous movie star in the world.

C now wanted to be his own boss, creating and directing films, but Hollywood did not take kindly to that idea. Then in 1918, he did something unthinkable for those times. He built his studio called Chaplin Studios and in 1921 released a movie, The Kid. It was Charlie’s story of pain, struggle, and hunger. It was funny and emotional. Charlie realized the tremendous impact that movies had on people. He continued making movies, and in 1931, when talking movies began to be made in Hollywood, Charlie continued with silent films. He released City Lights in 1931, which took the world by storm.

Towards the end of the 1930s, Hitler was making his presence felt, spreading hate and fear. Charlie realized that Hitler and he had the same kind of mustache, and people were beginning to notice. He decided to fight the horror that was Hitler with comedy.  Charlie Chaplin made a movie called The Great Dictator. In the final scene, Charlie gives a speech where he says, “We think too much and feel too little; more than machinery, we need humanity. Let us fight for a world of reason! Let us fight for freedom.” This was his first talking movie. The speech proved that Charlie was not just a comedian; he was a fighter. Some people did not like his political messages and began spreading lies about him. Then, in 1952, he was forced to leave America. He stopped making movies and moved to Switzerland, where he lived a quiet life with his family.

Then, in 1972, after 20 years, Hollywood realized its mistake. They invited him back. At the Oscars, they gave him a standing ovation- minutes of applause.

Charlie’s life teaches us never to give up, whatever the obstacles. Charlie held on to his dream and grew to become a legend.

The world’s greatest comedian passed away at the age of 88 on December 25^th, 1977.

 

 

“I feel I am privileged to express a hope. The hope is this: that we shall have peace throughout the world, that we shall abolish wars and settle all international differences at the conference table, and that we shall abolish all atom and hydrogen bombs before they abolish us. The future of the modern world demands modern thinking. Therefore, let us use the full force of our intelligence instead of obsolete homicidal methods in settling our international differences.”

(Charlie Chaplin on his 70^th birthday)

 

“All I need to make a comedy is a park, a policeman, and a pretty girl.”

(From his autobiography)

 

“Life can be wonderful if you're not afraid of it. All it needs is courage, imagination, and a little dough.”

Charlie Chaplin

 

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Calm and Chaos: Navigating through Chaos

 

Chaos and Calm: Finding calm in chaos

 

Calm and chaos are two dissimilar states that coexist in our lives. The disorder of chaos can create beauty and purpose. Navigation through the chaos and finding your calm is what life is about. 

 

The predictability and order of calm:

A tranquil lake, a gentle breeze, or a gurgling brook embodies the state of calm, evoking peace and mindfulness. When you are calm, your thoughts are clear, your mind is at rest, and you are fully present in the moment. A calm state of mind allows you to navigate life’s challenges gracefully and rationally.

 

The disorder that is chaos:

A cluttered desk, traffic jams, a struggle to meet deadlines, an erratic morning routine, fractured relationships, heated arguments, violent storms, volcanic activity, and wildfires would well define chaos. They bring a sense of disorder and a loss of control. Prolonged exposure to chaos will cause emotions to run high, indecision, anxiety, and burnout.

 

Finding the calm in chaos:

While chaos is often viewed as a negative state, some level of chaos is required for growth and adaptation. The key is to  balance the two states, ensuring that chaos does not overwhelm you but allows for creativity and resilience. Amid chaos, the mind is pushed to think out of the box, to problem solve, and may discover unexpected solutions. Scientific breakthroughs are often born of accidents and failed experiments. In everyday life, you get creative when plans go awry. You can’t change the chaos, but you can learn to thrive within it.

Thriving in chaos and seeking calm.

People react differently to chaos and calm. Some thrive in chaos while others seek the stability and peace of calm.

 

People are attracted to chaos because

·       They get bored and restless in structured environments.

·       They are driven by uncertainty and excitement.

 

People seek calm because

·       They fear the unknown

·       They find comfort in familiarity and routine.

 

If chaos is your thing:

·       Include some structure to avoid a crash.

·       Determine when to slow down and reflect.

 

If calm is what you prefer:

·       Step out of your comfort zone occasionally.

·       Accept that the disorder of chaos can foster creativity and growth. 

 

Some Techniques to Find Calm:

 

·       Breath work

Deep and slow breathing helps your nervous system relax.

 

·       Mindfulness and meditation

Simply focusing on your breath and being present in the moment aids your thought process.

 

·       Exercise and movement

Movement is medicine. Any kind of physical activity, be it a walk, yoga, or stretches, calms the mind.

 

·       Journaling

Writing down your thoughts helps you process your emotions and make sense of chaos.

 

·       The nature connection

Spending time outdoors, connecting with nature, is sure to soothe your chaotic mind.

 

·       Decluttering

Decluttering and organizing your space helps you think clearly and function well.

 

Sharing your woes

Talking to a friend or a confidante can help you navigate the chaos.

Have you found creativity in a chaotic moment? 

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Beyond the Mirror : Redefining beauty

 

“You are imperfect, permanently and inevitably flawed. And you are beautiful. (Amy Bloom, author.)

“What you do, the way you think, makes you beautiful.”(Scott Westerfeld, author.)

“Sometimes people are beautiful, not in looks, not in the way they say. Just in what they are. “(Markus Zusak)

 

The adage, ”Beauty is but skin deep,” is as true as true can be. There are parameters by which we measure beauty, but beauty goes beyond the parameters, which include the colour of your skin, a flawless complexion, a figure to die for, straight teeth, or glossy hair.

Physical beauty is fleeting and skin deep. Here today, gone tomorrow. We would like to be beautiful or handsome, but beauty and handsomeness don’t last. It’s okay to want to be good-looking and take the necessary steps, but the feeling and steps must not become an obsession. 

The definition of beauty that we are constantly presented with holds little worth or value. The cosmetic industry promises miracles, and we fall for it. Crooked teeth don’t matter if your smile lights up a room or brings joy to another. Your awkward gait or pleasantly plump persona does not put you at a disadvantage. 

True beauty lies in the helping hand you lend and the thoughtfulness and kindness you show to others. Your beauty shines through the scars you bear and the lessons you learn when life knocks you down. The hardships you endure and the strength and resilience that help you keep going are what make you a truly beautiful person. All the Botox in the world cannot create the beauty that radiates from a thoughtful gesture or a compassionate heart.

In conclusion, it is your quirks, your story, your imperfections, and your uniqueness that make you beautiful. Don’t deny them, but embrace them.

I share with you a poem that I penned a few years ago

Dear Mirror,

 Dear Mirror,

I think you don’t quite see it all.

Silvered and salted hair I’d fain conceal,

But my tender heart, By deeds I shall reveal.

 

Zeroing in on that extra inch or curve

On the surface, can’t you discern that steely nerve?

You dwell upon the line and wrinkle

But don’t you see the merry eyes that twinkle?

 

Never mind that double chin

There’s a gentle woman hidden deep within

My jeans have gone three sizes larger

I don’t think I can stretch them any farther.

 

Mirror, dear mirror

My sagging figure and face

I know too well have sadly fallen from grace

But underneath that drab and flab, you see

Is a beautiful, warm, and spirited me.

 

A daughter, a wife, a sister, or a mother

To my parents, husband, children, or brother

I bring to all I do the feminine touch

If not me, their lives would lose so much.

 

One day at a time is all to which I aspire

In your esteem, may I rise just a little higher?

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A World With No Internet

“Two weeks! Tanya’s mind spun over what she had just heard. Two weeks of no internet and electricity. What is she supposed to do with her life in these two weeks?

(This is an excerpt from an e-book, A World without the Internet by Ivan So.)

 

International Internet Day is celebrated on October 29th. On this day, the world remembers with gratitude this important human invention that has transformed our way of living. It is difficult to envisage an internet-free world. But again, the internet is not the Alpha and Omega of our existence. A break from the invention now and again would do you a world of good. 

A few decades ago, or at least when I was growing up, every schoolchild worth his salt needed to possess an atlas and a dictionary. We cut pictures from magazines and newspapers for school projects, looked up encyclopedias, and stocked up on stationery. Mom and Dad regularly patronized stores for groceries and stuff.

Today, the internet takes care of it all. Could you envisage waking up to a world without the internet? Hardly. From e-commerce portals to social media, we rely on the internet to survive.  

 

How a world without the internet would impact our lives:

 

Communication:

·       Social media would be non-existent. Nobody would check their phones on waking, which, anyway, we are told is a bad habit, but we are a mixture of bad and good habits. We would be living a life without emails, WhatsApp messages, Instagram, and other online platforms. We’d go back to telephones, handwritten letters, telegrams, and face-to-face interactions.

 

· Entertainment:

Theaters and popcorn would make a comeback, as would CDs, DVDs, and record players. We wouldn’t hear or know of streaming platforms or virtual gaming portals.

 

· Finance:

Writing cheques and physical deposit and withdrawal of money is what we would be doing. Online banking would be nonexistent.  Some seniors are more comfortable making cash payments and prefer physical withdrawal or deposit of money.

 

·  Shopping:

Keeping in mind the opening and closing times of brick-and-mortar stores, we would have to get off the couch and head to shops to make our purchases. No Amazon Prime Day or Flipkart Big Billion Day sale here. 

 

· Education:

The internet has helped make learning more accessible. Again, the physical classroom and physical classroom teaching would make a comeback. Libraries would be popular as online learning resources would be absent.

 

· News and Information:

Newspapers, magazines, radio, and television would be our sources of news. There would be no digital information available or no heated virtual discussions.

 

·Travel

Asking for directions and using paper maps would become commonplace again.

 

Benefits of an Internet-Free World:

 The internet has undoubtedly changed our lives for the better in numerous ways, but how would an internet-free world benefit us?

 

· Stronger personal bonding

An internet-free world would bring family and friends closer. Connections and relationships would probably be deepened.

 

· Enhanced privacy and security.

Your personal information would be secure, thereby reducing the risks of cybercrime.

 

·Simple Living

People would have more time to engage in outdoor activities, enjoy lower stress levels, and get closer to nature.

 

Used wisely, the internet is a boon, but as always, too much of anything is not a good thing. Balance is the key. Fun can happen outside the internet, too.

Yes, fun can happen outside the internet, as young Tanya discovers. The 40-page book is available on Kindle.

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