Setting Boundaries: Your peace and space matter.

 

Setting Boundaries: Your peace and space matter. 

 

 

What are boundaries?

Setting boundaries is an essential aspect of self-care. It is a life skill that helps you prioritize and recognize your self-worth and avoid burnout. Boundaries are limits that we establish for ourselves and those set by others to maintain healthy and respectful relationships. Boundaries define what is acceptable to us and what is not. Additionally, setting boundaries also helps us stay stress-free while keeping us financially and emotionally healthy. Boundaries should not be viewed as walls, but rather as bridges to healthier and more meaningful relationships

Kinds of boundaries:

 

Physical boundaries

Physical boundaries relate to our personal space, touch, and proximity. You may not like being hugged or like someone standing too close to you, and you communicate the same to the person.

 

Emotional boundaries

Emotional boundaries relate to how much of what is happening in your life you confide in a person. You may not be comfortable confiding your financial or relationship woes to somebody. Thus, you are setting an emotional boundary.

 

Mental Boundaries

Mental boundaries relate to our thoughts, ideas, beliefs, and opinions. Your beliefs, thoughts, ideas, and opinions may differ from those of your friend, and you and your friend respect the difference, thereby setting a mental boundary.

 

Boundaries are bound to differ from person to person. What spells a comfort level for one may not be the same for the other. Similarly, the boundaries you set for family will be different from those that you set for friends and acquaintances.

 

How do you set boundaries?

 

Understand your needs

Get clear about moments that leave you feeling drained. Your workload may need to be lessened, or you may need more time alone.

 

Be clear in your communication.  

Be straightforward.  You don’t owe anyone a lengthy explanation. A simple “I’m not available today” is more than enough.

 

 

Consistency

Stick with the boundaries you have set. Be assertive. It’s okay to say no because it’s your well-being that matters.  Don’t feel guilty. People may try and push if you’ve been in the habit of obliging. Stand firm. It gets better with practice.

 

Be ready for the brickbats.

Not everyone will take kindly to your boundaries, but that’s fine. Don’t waver.

 

Baby Steps

You need not overhaul your entire life in one go. Take baby steps. You might want to start by responding to WhatsApp messages only within a certain time frame.

 

Be nice to yourself

It’s okay if you slip up once in a while. You don’t need to beat yourself up about it. Setting boundaries is not a one-time task. Be patient with yourself as you master the art of saying no or asking for what you need.

 

Setting boundaries is not selfish but essential. You cannot pour from an empty cup. Once you’ve established boundaries, you show up as the best version of yourself, always present for others.

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